The coolest 4 year old ever

A hit-or-miss hodgepode of hyperbolicism...

The coolest 4 year old ever

Postby 12ozLongneck on Thu Dec 17, 2009 5:32 pm

April Wright is 21 years old and is going through a divorce with her husband who is in jail. She says she is not sure how her 4-year-old managed to get out of the house, open a beer, and steal the neighbors presents from under their tree. Now she's just glad he's okay and says she won't let it happen again.

The child, Hayden Wright, was found around 1:45 am Tuesday, wandering the streets of his neighborhood. In a police reports, officers said he was wearing a little girl's dress and drinking a beer. The police report says the child had to be taken to the hospital to be treated for alcohol consumption.


Minus the whole dress wearing thing, he sounds like our kind of people.

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Re: The coolest 4 year old ever

Postby SmoothLonghorn on Thu Dec 17, 2009 6:09 pm

Where is Sally Struthers when I want to adopt this child?!
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Re: The coolest 4 year old ever

Postby UTwiz on Thu Dec 17, 2009 6:49 pm

Wheeler finally built the DeLorean time machine.
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Re: The coolest 4 year old ever

Postby ChuckNorrisHorn on Thu Dec 17, 2009 10:28 pm

"He runs away trying to find his father," she said. "He wants to get in trouble so he can go to jail because that's where his daddy is."
It was basically like starring in a bukkake video with Charlie the Tuna.


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Re: The coolest 4 year old ever

Postby Silverado on Fri Dec 18, 2009 12:38 am

Wow.
"All that schooling, and it takes a knucklehead who's passed out on the couch with a foam finger on to connect them with the outside world."--JRod
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